Back in an earlier life, I had the desire to become a pharmacist and went to college to satiate that desire. You see, my uncle owned a drugstore and I was a “soda jerk”, specifically asked for to make banana splits, which were my specialty. Under the influence of my drugstore owner uncle and another uncle who was a doctor, two years at North Georgia College and then being accepted to UGA pharmacy school, I made the decision to become a druggist/pharmacist.
After four quarters of chemistry and other pharmacy related courses, I made the decision I just couldn’t handle being a pill pusher and being stuck in a drugstore for the rest of my life. So, journalism school and I became a perfect match.
While in pharmacy school, my uncle let me work behind the prescription counter, counting pills, pouring stuff in bottles, and other things related to filling prescriptions and filling capsules with powdered sugar for placebos. There were several customers that their doctors wrote prescriptions for their “ailments” thus the powdered sugar placebo capsules.
Then there was the asphidity bag, a most foul smelling drug derived from a plant that was placed in a small cloth bag and hung around the neck believed to ward off colds, polio, flu, hives and people. You could smell a person coming more than six-feet away that was wearing an asphidity bag and you didn’t want to get close to a person wearing an asphidity bag…it stinks! The bag probably worked because nobody contagious or otherwise wanted to get close to the bag wearer.
Now after all that explaining, here’s my suggestion: everybody should be issued an asphidity bag. Nope won’t work because then everybody would be smelling the same and the mask producers and sellers would expect a government settlement because nobody would be buying a mask.
Instead of wearing a mask, I am looking for some asphidity. If you find an asafetida plant, the oil from that plant is used to make the asafitidy bag. That’s my get-rich-scheme for the month.
HAVE YOU noticed the TV ads for funeral homes? Atlanta TV channels have had quite a few different funeral home advertisings.
And I am seeing advertising for condoms, which brings be back to my uncle’s drugstore. But first, in drugstores and even Walmart, condoms have shelf space and display and there are many different kinds and “flavors”. I haven’t seen any publicly displayed at the dollar stores but I will look more intently.
Now, when a gentleman came into the drugstore, it was obvious he did not have a prescription to be filled and he wanted to speak to “Dr. Black”. I learned in a hurry that was a private signal that he wanted to purchase a condom or condoms. Dr. Black kept his variety of condoms in a drawer in the prescription department. He always put the order in a bag.
I GOT this email and will share it with the writer’s permission: “Don, I have given a lot of thought and consideration as to whom I will vote for chairman. Since Chairman Tapley said he won’t be attending the forum sponsored by the Reporter, I just don’t trust him to be open when it comes to his governing. And the school board race up in your district, the Dr. didn’t show for the forum. Maybe he is just not going to be transparent. You know HIPPA stuff. He wants to be invisible. He needs to stick with doctoring instead of politicking. And the other school board no-show pleaded she was just obeying the governor. This is turning out to be one of the strangest local political seasons ever. Is Commissioner Evans going to publicly debate his challenger? Is Commissioner Rowland publicly going to debate the ex-fire chief? These no-shows are all about themselves, damn the voters and the citizens they brag they want to serve! Thank you.”
THIS WEEK is meeting week, with the commissioners having met Tuesday morning not at their regular meeting place but at the Monroe County Conference Center. Reviewing the agenda, the three things that will be more than likely contentious are TSPLOST, discussion at the Internet Expansion and of course Commissioner Evans and the Energy Savings Project through which, at their last meeting, Commissioner Evans claimed Commissioner Eddie Rowland broke the law. Will be a most interesting meeting.
Monday night, the Forsyth City Council met and wonder if the councilmen and city staff in attendance wore masks or was it a Zoom meeting? Will and Diane will be writing a full report on the discussion of renovation of the city owned golf course and a public hearing to provide standard parking space widths.
THESE FROM the on-line Vent: “Sales tax revenues for the county are going to be down a bunch due to corona. Hope the board factors that in to budget/debt obligations.” “Evans going after Rowland is like Japan bombing Pearl Harbor and Davis is the Nuke”.
HERE’S THE Question for this week: What is the asking price for the sale of “Forsyth’s antebellum jewel on market for first time since 1909”? First correct answer after 12 noon on Thursday gets the certificate for a dozen Dunkin Donuts, Dairy Queen Blizzard, slice of Shoney’s strawberry pie, single dip of Scoops ice cream, slice of Jonah’s Pizza, Whistle Stop fried green tomato appetizer and a Forsyth Main Street t-shirt.
There were two correct answers to last week’s The Question but answerers were winners in the last two weeks and were ineligible for the certificate.
AND FINALLY this from a Facebook post: First it was alcohol kills Covid. Then heat may kill Covid. Now direct sunlight may kill Covid. So, if you see me outside in my yard, drunk, naked and lying in the sun, mind your own business. I’m conducting important medical experiments.
Don Daniel founded the Reporter in 1972. Email him at email@example.com.